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When you don't need a 'How are we doing' Survey

Chicago, December 10, 2020 (AP): Common Sense was run over by a careless email driver in a "How can we do better?" hit and run tragedy.

"It was an email marketing sports car, that jumped the SPAM Red light and ran Common Sense over.", said Saurabh Gupta, a local resident who

witnessed the tragedy from his Gmail.

Common Sense is survived by hope and frustration, who are temporarily living with Mr. and Mrs. Customer, their family friend.

"I do not understand why someone would do that? Common Sense just wanted to make the world a better place.", said Mr. Customer in an

emotional moment.

Mr. Deliverability, Email driver's lawyer released this statement

"My Client is trying to make the world a better place by sending 320M survey emails.

Our emails have an unsubscribe link for recipients to login or create a new account, and unsubscribe. It only takes a few minutes.

We request that Common Sense's demise is not politicized."

Mr. Deliverability's friend, Ms. Arrogance tweeted - "Sure y'all got 5 mins for mass emails. You ain't a $20K/hour lawyer like D!"

Memorial contributions may be made to the Common Sense Family Fund, in care of Mr. and Mrs. Customer, Main Street, Everytown.

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